Despite the loss of freedom - a majority of participants said their social lives had entirely changed since becoming fathers - 95 percent of group participants said they are happy their children were born. Indeed, most men spoke passionately of their love for their children and regard themselves as competent fathers. The majority of fathers see their children more than once a week, and during visits perform the entire range of caretaking activities. Asked what the most important aspect of the parent-child relationship is, most said love, support and good communication. Although many expressed the wish that they had waited to have children, few said they felt too young to handle the responsibility. Indeed, 85% said they thought they had handled fatherhood well so far, and even more said they considered themselves "good fathers." Nearly 100 percent of the fathers said they have "big plans" for their children, and that they intend to be involved with their children forever. This was true even of fathers who did not see their children regularly due to family disputes or distance.

Seeing (my son) in the morning - I think that's great, you know. Waking up, sleeping, I think that's the best thing about being a father. Tucking the kids in at night, kissing them goodnight. They're always going to remember that, you know.

The best thing is knowing you got somebody to love, somebody to live for.

All the things I didn't have when I was young, I try to give it to him. When I was young, I didn't have this, I didn't have that. I don't want him to grow up that way.

What I like about being a father is the fact that it's opened up my eyes. I've got certain responsibilities....

If I was to ask myself if I was a good father - I mean, I try to strongly do 150 percent of everything I can. I decided to do it that way. I'm a good provider, I talk to him about everything, and I think that's important, to talk to him.

The first time (my stepdaughter) called me Dad, that's it, no more. I just stopped. I didn't drink anymore. I just gave up everything. At that point, I was still doing everything I had in the past year - you know, hanging out with friends out on the corner, and running up and down the streets and just going crazy. And then as soon as she called me Dad, it was just like, you know, there's a responsibility put on my shoulders, and I'm aware that you have to be a role model for that child. And if you're dead, what is this child going to have to look at? ... It's like, wow, a reality booster, you know. I'm a Dad. I've got to act like one, and not a hoodlum, or act like a jerk on the street and get shot up or something like that.

I looked at all the things I didn't have, the things that I didn't accomplish, and I just said to myself, 'I'm not going to let my little man run down that road I went down.'

I was out there doing all this stuff, selling drugs, carrying a gun, you know. Then (my daughter) was born, and I just quit. I didn't want to do it no more. It totally changed me from the direction I was going. Totally.

That's my little heart. That's my little heart. That's what's keeping me alive now.

When you bring somebody into the world, it's like everybody say, it's like a constant wake-up. Like, it's time to put your toys away and time to pick up your tools and start working.

Having a kid is like a boost of energy. You got to stay on top. You can't fall.

I go out and buy G.I. Joes, and we play with them. Sometimes I even find myself playing with them. Like they would be on the carpet, my son would be upstairs, and I'll start playing with them. And I'm like, 'Hey, come here and we'll play something.' I feel like an idiot, you know.

The smile on my kid's face - that's the best thing about being a father.

We worked a little schedule out. She was with him from like eight in the morning to like eight at night, and she'd go to sleep and I'd have him from eight at night to eight in the morning. He'd be up every three hours crying ... I used to wake up, and we'd watch that show, 'The Untouchables.' He didn't know what it was about. He was five months old when he started sleeping all night.

Introduction | The Project | Their Own Fathers | Becoming A Father | Life With Children | Family Conflict | Violence and the Children | In School | Money | The Law | Housing | Jobs and Dream Jobs | Improving the System | Findings | Recommendations